Shabbat Beha’alotecha
Torah: Numbers
8:1 - 12:16 / Haftarah: Zechariah 2:14 - 4:7
“Being There”
Dear Friends,
This week’s Torah portion includes a curious
incident that has invited speculation and interpretation for millennia. As the Children of Israel are making their
way to the Promised Land, one day Miriam and Aaron make a public protest
against Moses because of his marriage to a Cushite woman. That’s it.
That’s the story. Beyond that, we
have no idea what it’s about.
Some interpreters suggest that Miriam and Aaron
were upset that Moses’ wife, Tziporah, was not a Hebrew and would have
preferred that he marry a woman from amongst the Children of Israel. Were they raising the banner of
intermarriage? Other interpreters suggest
that they were upset because Tziporah had dark skin. Perhaps this is a story of biblical racism. Were
personal family politics afoot?
Consider an interpretation by Jacob ben Isaac
Ashkenazi, the author of Tzeinah u-reinah, a Medieval commentary on Judaism
written especially for women. Askenazi
explains that Miriam and Aaron’s complaint against Moses stems from Moses’
treatment of his wife. Perhaps they
overheard Moses tell Tziporah that he was so occupied with his work on behalf
of the community that he had no time for her and the children. They could have concluded that Moses was
neglecting his family and thus became concerned for Tziporah’s well being. Instead of embarrassing Moses in public,
Ashkenazi suggests that they were reproaching him so that he would be more
responsive to his family.
Sound familiar – being so busy that we have no time
for our families? Some say that being
stressed and over occupied is just a part of contemporary Western society. Ignoring our spouses, lovers and families is
just the way that we keep up with the rat-race.
It’s the way we provide for them, even if we rarely spend any time,
quality or other, together. For the more
than four thousand years that the Jewish People has existed, it is precisely
the Jewish family that has been the foundation of it all. With solid families behind and around us, we
find love and support in our partners and spouses. With strong families, we can raise children
who will be confident, compassionate, generous and loving. Through resilient families we can build our
Jewish communities to be a family of families.
The trick is this.
Having a family founded on love and trust requires us to be there – to
be with lovers and children; to be there with brothers, sisters, parents and
grandparents; to be there with nieces, nephews, cousins, aunts and uncles.
Being there is what it is all about. This does not mean spending numerous hours of
‘family time’ zoned out in front of the TV or computer, closed off under
headphones, tucked away in a basement hobby room, or out on the running track
or golf course. Yes, there is time for
all of that, too. But most important,
raising a Jewish family is about spending time with family, doing things
together, listening, talking, learning and teaching.
It wasn’t too late for Moses and it is not too late
for any of us, either. The spring is here and summer is soon at hand. Even if our first attempts at making changes
for the better seem awkward and unsuccessful, keep at it. For the sake of our
families and our souls, spend good time together as a matter of regular
habit. Worship together, study together
and do acts of loving-kindness together.
Live healthy lives together.
We could all do very well to heed Miriam and
Aaron’s warning. L’chaim!
Shabbat Shalom,
Rabbi Eitan Weiner-Kaplow
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